Friday, September 12th, 6:55AM. The iPhone 17 pre-orders are about to go live. Since their announcement on Tuesday I’ve been undergoing the usual mental gymnastics where my Inner Accountant fights with the Carefree Creative who needs the latest gadget. We’ll call them IA and CC for short.
Having a kid is a new justification to always have the best possible camera on hand to capture memories. I explain how much better the cameras are to my wife, but her only response is to ensure I understand that having an orange phone is a grave error.
Since I first started carrying a phone, a Nokia 3310 featuring WAP connectivity and Snake, I’ve been on a biennial upgrade cycle. Selling my old phone while it still holds value, and giving at least a little breathing room for the now iterative updates to add up to something more substantial.
Phones today are incredible, an essential part of our lives to connect, learn and be entertained. But they’re a mature product. Innovation has slowed as companies try to figure out if thinner and lighter, folding, or even a completely different form factor will make their product the next must-have. In the meantime, waiting three to four years to get a new phone will not leave you lacking.
“However, for a tech nerd to not have the latest gadget is akin to stabbing them in the eye”, my CC cries in dramatic anguish. Exasperated, my IA replies, “Fine, let’s see if it passes the test.” They walk over to the purchase test room in quadrant G295 of my brain. Torn images of Teslas, camera equipment and short-lived sports lay in a bin waiting for memory incineration.
The Test
Is it something you absolutely need?
“YES!!! The Pro has the most incredible cameras ever in an iPhone, and liquid cooling, and pro filming features,” my CC cries while writhing on the floor. My IA looks over their spectacles at the scene before confirming this as a hard no.
If not, is it something you’ve saved for?
My IA checks the budget and confirms that our family does indeed save to be able to buy a new phone every two years. ✔ My wife hears the commotion in my head and pronounces that this is a budget meeting for which she will expect a reward for attendance.
Even though you may have saved for it, is it something you will get a lot of use out of?
“Most of us use our phones every single day, multiple times a day, for too many hours a day. It’s a camera that’s always with us, a professor of all world knowledge on speed dial, a Bible, a language tutor, a personal secretary and home to more entertainment than can ever be consumed in a thousand lifetimes.”
“I’ll take that as a yes,” confirms my IA as my CC picks themselves off the floor and wipes away tears.
Improvements, however incremental, on something you use every day can make a big difference. At least that’s what I tell myself so I can get a new iPhone.
With those two agreeing terms, I can now decide which iPhone to get. The newly announced iPhone Air looks stunning. Going back to the days when the phones got thinner, lighter and shinier every year. But as someone who loves capturing visual memories, whether it’s a beautiful picture of my family, a Cayman sunset or a video for YouTube, the only iPhone I ever really pay close attention to is the iPhone Pro.
I contemplate having a bright orange phone for more than a few moments, but decide on a nice safe blue colour instead as I watch my wife out of the corner of my eye. It’s 7AM, I succumb to the consumerism and click buy.
A decision in 5 minutes! Blue is safe, orange screams YOLO!